The Unlikely Bully

Growing up in this day and age is difficult.  We are constantly being compared to and comparing ourselves to others.  It's extremely degrading.  From the time we are little, we can't get away from the feeling that maybe we aren't good enough.  For the most part, I blame the media.  Being barraged by these thoughts and ideas from external sources takes a toll.  Eventually, we begin to believe it.

I have not been exempt from this trend.  In fact, I've been bullied because of my shortcomings, but not from others.  I became my own bully when I bought into all the lies that I heard from society.   If you hear something enough, you will probably begin to believe that it's true.  In my case, I was never directly targeted and people rarely pointed out things in my life that I should change.  However, I started having doubts about myself and began to mentally put myself down.

Self-talk, or how you speak to yourself, is crucial to how you feel about yourself.  Once I realized this, I began to change how I spoke to myself.  There is so much power behind the words in our head.  It can build us up or tear us down.  Maybe you don't even realize that you are hurting yourself through your own thoughts.  If that is the case, are the words you say to yourself okay to say to others or would you be considered a bully if they were spoken aloud about another person?  Putting your thoughts in a different perspective can help you to understand that it's not acceptable to treat yourself badly.  You don't deserve it, no matter what you've been telling yourself.  It's unhealthy for your mental state of mind. 

One excuse for self-bullying that I have heard is that it keeps a person humble, but I want to make it very clear that this is not true.  In fact, it seems that bullying exposes how self-centered a person can be.  When I realized the destructive thoughts I was having about myself, I also realized that I had a hard time taking my thoughts away from myself.  My own insecurities became difficult to look past and began to overtake my mind.  As I began to filter my thoughts to a more healthy way of thinking, much like having a filter for my mouth, I found that I was focusing much less on myself. 

Not only is self-bullying bad for you, but what do you think God would say about it?  He commands us to love one another, and I believe that includes ourselves.  He loves us and has seen all of the mistakes we have made, so why can't we also accept ourselves.  If you are struggling with this topic, ask God what He thinks of you.  Write it down and believe it.  Don't let your own opinions become more important that those from our creator.  If you have questions, leave them in the comments or tweet me @TheEmptyCorner and I will be sure to get back to you.

Confession #2: Loving yourself is more difficult than it sounds