Things from Kings

Reading through the Old Testament is hard.  This is my second attempt at it, and I just recently finished 2 Kings.  I would much rather read the New Testament over and over, but I would say it is probably unwise to neglect the rest of the Bible just because it isn't as interesting.  In an attempt to better understand the information that I've digested from 1 & 2 Kings over the past weeks, I'm going to share a little of what I've learned.

"You will drink from the brook, and I have directed the ravens to supply you with food there." 
- 1 Kings 17:4

In this verse, God promises to provide Elijah with food and water.  It is such a simple verse, but it came at a particularly important time for me.  You see, it's not always easy to trust God with everything.  I tend to look to other sources for provision.  Sometimes that source is my parents or my friends or something that I hope will come in the future.  No matter what that source is, it should always be secondary to God.  I'm not good at remembering that or applying it to my life, but I needed that reminder.  God was able to provide for Elijah using a raven, and God is able to provide everything we need in more spectacular ways than we can imagine.

2 Kings 6:1-7

In this passage, God (through Elijah) makes an axhead float.  In the story, a group of men are cutting down trees when the axhead fell into the water.  This seems very insignificant, but it should not be overlooked.  God cared enough at that time to make the axhead float so that they could continue what they were doing.  This shows that God notices what happens in our daily lives, and He cares.  In this case, He cared enough to make their lives easier by doing the impossible.  Not only does He care, but God is willing to work miracles in our daily circumstances.  Never be afraid to ask God for something extraordinary even if the situation seems insignificant.

2 Kings 20

In this passage, God tells Hezekiah that he is going to die.  Upon receiving this message, Hezekiah asks God to heal him and to extend his life.  God agrees and adds fifteen years to Hezekiah's life.  When I read that Hezekiah asked God to change something that had already been decided, I was surprised.  Part of me thought that it was rude.  God had decided his time was up, but Hezekiah asked for a change of plans.  I doubt I would ask God for that sort of change, but maybe God wants us to ask Him to do greater things.  I'm not saying we should challenge what God has declared.  What I am saying is that maybe I should challenge more of what life throws at me.  I tend to think that I'm meant to go through a challenge if it has been brought to my doorstep.  What if I started asking God for miracles in these circumstances? What if I challenged life a little? It would give God the opportunity to show me more of Himself, which would increase my faith.  It may even make life a little easier at times.  I know we aren't called to live easy lives, but I think God wants us to ask for His help sometimes.  This may just mean that our circumstances are less of a final verdict than I originally thought.  

Music Monday: Joy

My original intention with Music Mondays was for it to appear on a fairly regular basis.  My apologies for that not happening, but it is not going away altogether.  I never want to force content.  Instead, I prefer to wait until I have the time to share about a song that really means something to me.  That being said, the second installment is here!

"Joy" is a song that I first heard a month or two ago.  At the time, I was struggling with various things going on in my life and my mind.  As soon as the song began, I let down some of the walls that I so carefully erect in my mind to keep a semblance of order to my thoughts.  The lyrics in the song and the sincerity with which they are sung gave me peace.  Even though I felt that I was unraveling, it was important for me to acknowledge what I was facing.  I needed that song to tell me that I wasn't alone in what I was facing.  As I listened to each word, I found that each one perfectly fit the emotions that were rolling through me.    

In the past week, I've been reminded of some of those struggles.  My roommate and I have been continually repeating the phrase "Life is hard."  When I feel this way, it's difficult for me to feel God's joy in my life.  I get stuck in a place that's hard to describe and even harder to get out of.  Last Monday was the first day of classes for yet another year of my college experience.  For many, syllabus week is considered easy, but for someone with anxiety that is simply not the case.  I'm not going to lie, the first two days were difficult.  It got better from there, but those days reminded me once again of this song.

This got a little heavy, but I won't leave it at that and neither does this song.  Despite all of the hard things we go through in life, it is a comfort to know that God is right beside us.  He somehow allows us to have joy through the most difficult of circumstances.  Because of that, I will proclaim His greatness through each trial that I face.  Even when I don't feel joy, even when life is hard, it is well with my soul.

"Joy"

by Page CXVI

I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy
down in my heart down in my heart 
I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy 
down in my heart down in my heart 

And I'm so happy so happy so very happy 
And I'm so happy so happy so very happy 
I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy 
down in my heart down in my heart 
I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy 
down in my heart down in my heart 
And I'm so happy so happy so very happy 
And I'm so happy so happy so very happy 

And I can't understand 
and I can't pretend 
that this will be alright in the end 
so I'll try my best 
and lift up my chest 
to sing about this... joy, joy joy! 

When peace like a river attendeth my way 
when sorrows like sea billows roll 
whatever my lot 
thou has taught me to say 
it is well, it is well, with my soul

An Abundance of Grace

Last summer was a busy one for me.  I traveled to multiple states and learned a lot through my experiences.  This summer has been more calm, so I want to take some time to reflect on what God has been teaching me these past few months.  Having all those new experiences last year was great, and God really used those to shape me.  However, He has also used the calm of this summer to teach me some valuable lessons.

Back in June, I began reading "The Search for Significance" by Robert S. McGee.  I really enjoyed this book and all that it taught me about myself and my relationship with God.  Also, I now realize that this book was perfectly placed in my life.  What I mean is that God placed it in my path at just the right time to teach me something that I might have missed at another point in my life.  When I began reading this book, I was also just starting a new job for the summer.  I was getting caught up in a lot of guilt over not doing things right at my job.  I felt that I needed to perform perfectly in order to be accepted by my coworkers.  Additionally, I felt that perfection had to be achieved in order to feel good about myself.  My mind was operating in a dangerous and unhealthy way. 

Truth began to seep into my mind and overtake the unhealthy thoughts as I read what McGee had to say.  He mentions multiple times in the book that we are fully pleasing to God.  This concept was a difficult one for me to grasp.  How can sinners be "fully pleasing"?  I wanted to fight back and tell God all of the reasons that I am not fully pleasing.  However, as I began my argument, I felt God pushing back.  I heard Him telling me to stop fighting the truth.  I am, we are, fully pleasing to Him because we have been made righteous by accepting Jesus.

When God began to fight back, I began to listen.  I realized that my view of myself is not always correct.  Just because it's my opinion does not make it right.  This began a new way of thinking about myself.  I had to start resisting my own unhealthy thoughts and accepting the healing words of God.  Even when I messed up at work, I had to tell myself that everything was okay.

God's grace (unmerited favor) is so much bigger than my imperfections.  It covers the large and the small mistakes.  It covers the intentional and unintentional sins.  His grace has no limit.  While I understood that before, I had trouble applying it to my life.  I struggled with giving myself grace.  To be honest, I still struggle with giving myself grace.  In the society we live in, grace isn't natural.  We are told that every action has a consequence.  In no way am I saying that we have a free pass to sin, but I am saying that love and grace need to be the basis of our approach when we find that we have sinned.  So, in response to God's abundant grace for us, go and be gracious remembering to love God, love others, and love yourself.

Confession #3: Grace isn't always easy

Proverbs 16:24

Gracious words are a honeycomb,

sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. 

I think we can all learn from this verse.  Just last week, gay marriage was legalized in the United States.  Since then, there have been many  Christians spewing hateful words towards the gay community.  No one will ever be attracted to Christ if we call them a sinner and make them feel like they are somehow less than Christians.  They are, in fact, our equals.  I'm not just talking about homosexuals.  Everyone sins, and all sins are equal.  Sometimes it seems that certain sins come with a label, but don't allow a label to determine how you treat someone.  You don't have to agree with everyone.  However, it doesn't make sense to call yourself a follower of Christ and to be pushing people further away from God. 

Let's remember who we are to be representing.  Jesus hung out with the lowest of the low, and He loved them.  That means that we must show everyone the same respect and love.  There is nothing wrong with sticking to what the Bible says.  We just have to be careful that we don't stop loving others in our pursuit to see righteousness prevail.

I know this isn't the most uplifting thing I have ever written.  I just want the body of Christ to be aware.  Maybe this doesn't necessarily apply to you, but I've seen enough hate being spread that I had to say something about it.  Go on with your day and live life spreading gracious words.

Music Monday: Holy Spirit

Music has been a huge part of my life, and sometimes songs come along that really strike a chord in my heart.  This new series on the blog, which may or may not appear every week, is a way for me to share some of my favorite songs with you.  Some will be new, some will be old, but they will all mean something special to me.  I hope that you enjoy them just as much as I do.

The first installment of Music Monday is the song "Holy Spirit."  I'm not sure who originally sang it, but artists such as Francesca Battistelli and Kari Jobe have recently made it popular.  I first heard this song about two years ago, and it has been my favorite worship song ever since.  To be honest with you, sometimes I can't stand listening to Christian radio stations because the songs get repeated over and over and even new songs tend to have the same message as the others that we have been listening to for years.  However, this song is different.

The lyrics of "Holy Spirit" are honest, raw, and full of emotion.  When I hear this song, I am reminded of the delightful times I have had with God.  Being in His presence is the most satisfying thing I have ever experienced.  Naturally, I want that more.  I know that God is always with me and even dwells within me, but there is something so special about inviting His presence into my space.  To me, that's what this song is, a cry to God to draw near.  The chorus is as follows:

Holy Spirit, You are welcome here

Come flood this place and fill the atmosphere

your glory, God, is what our hearts long for

To be overcome by Your presence, Lord

Those lyrics outline the deepest desire of my heart.  Sometimes, the words come out as a desperate plea when I am reminded that I need God.  It's then that I beg for more of His presence to come, surround me, and become tangible.  We all have those moments where we need the world to wash away and be replaced by our God drawing so close that we can feel nothing but Him.  

The bridge of this song echos this same call to God:

Let us become more aware of Your presence

Let us experience the glory of Your goodness

If you have never heard this song, check out the video below.  Don't just listen to it though, worship with it.  The lyrics are so powerful, and I don't want you to miss out on the ways God may use this song in your life.  If you have never experienced the presence of God, I encourage you all the more.  He wants to be real to you and desires to spend time with you.  No place or time is off-limits for God.  Go and invite Him to be with you.  

The Unlikely Bully

Growing up in this day and age is difficult.  We are constantly being compared to and comparing ourselves to others.  It's extremely degrading.  From the time we are little, we can't get away from the feeling that maybe we aren't good enough.  For the most part, I blame the media.  Being barraged by these thoughts and ideas from external sources takes a toll.  Eventually, we begin to believe it.

I have not been exempt from this trend.  In fact, I've been bullied because of my shortcomings, but not from others.  I became my own bully when I bought into all the lies that I heard from society.   If you hear something enough, you will probably begin to believe that it's true.  In my case, I was never directly targeted and people rarely pointed out things in my life that I should change.  However, I started having doubts about myself and began to mentally put myself down.

Self-talk, or how you speak to yourself, is crucial to how you feel about yourself.  Once I realized this, I began to change how I spoke to myself.  There is so much power behind the words in our head.  It can build us up or tear us down.  Maybe you don't even realize that you are hurting yourself through your own thoughts.  If that is the case, are the words you say to yourself okay to say to others or would you be considered a bully if they were spoken aloud about another person?  Putting your thoughts in a different perspective can help you to understand that it's not acceptable to treat yourself badly.  You don't deserve it, no matter what you've been telling yourself.  It's unhealthy for your mental state of mind. 

One excuse for self-bullying that I have heard is that it keeps a person humble, but I want to make it very clear that this is not true.  In fact, it seems that bullying exposes how self-centered a person can be.  When I realized the destructive thoughts I was having about myself, I also realized that I had a hard time taking my thoughts away from myself.  My own insecurities became difficult to look past and began to overtake my mind.  As I began to filter my thoughts to a more healthy way of thinking, much like having a filter for my mouth, I found that I was focusing much less on myself. 

Not only is self-bullying bad for you, but what do you think God would say about it?  He commands us to love one another, and I believe that includes ourselves.  He loves us and has seen all of the mistakes we have made, so why can't we also accept ourselves.  If you are struggling with this topic, ask God what He thinks of you.  Write it down and believe it.  Don't let your own opinions become more important that those from our creator.  If you have questions, leave them in the comments or tweet me @TheEmptyCorner and I will be sure to get back to you.

Confession #2: Loving yourself is more difficult than it sounds

Psalm 119:9-16

^{Since July, I've been slowly reading through the book of Psalm in addition to studying other parts of the Bible.  I decided to start doing this when I was feeling far from God one day.  In the time that I've been working through it, I have found that it is such a refreshing book to read.  Many of the chapters can be read as prayers or worship to God.  Others reveal struggles that were faced by the author and give comfort to me in the times when I don't feel very strong.}  

^{Earlier this week, I read Psalm 199:9-16 and thought it was so simple and so profound.  The question posed in verse nine is one that I think many people struggle with.  What should we be doing?  What should we avoid doing?  Yet the answer given here is so simple: live according to the word of God.  Like most things, it sounds easier than it is.  However, the author is so wise.  He immediately goes to God asking for help.  We must do our part and seek God, but He is the only one who can give us the power to live according to His word.  We cannot do it alone.}  

^{Let us go humbly to God and allow Him to work in our lives.  Dive into scripture.  Pray fervently.  Don't be afraid to sit before Him in silence.  Allow His peace to wash over you like only He can do.  If that all seems a bit too much, just read the Bible.  It is our guide for how to live our lives righteously.  If we love God and believe that He is good, we should also desire to serve Him with our lives.  The Bible also reveals the character of God.  We have such a powerful tool in the Bible, and it should not be wasted.  If you haven't picked yours up in a while, do it today.  God is not mad at you for allowing it to collect a little dust.  He loves you more than you can imagine.}  

^{Psalm 119:9-16}

⁹ How can a young person stay on the path of purity?
    By living according to your word.
¹⁰ I seek you with all my heart;
    do not let me stray from your commands.
¹¹ I have hidden your word in my heart
    that I might not sin against you.
¹² Praise be to you, Lord;
    teach me your decrees.
¹³ With my lips I recount
    all the laws that come from your mouth.
¹⁴ I rejoice in following your statutes
    as one rejoices in great riches.
¹⁵ I meditate on your precepts
    and consider your ways.
¹⁶ I delight in your decrees;
    I will not neglect your word.

Forgetting God

Sometimes it feels like life is moving one million miles per hour and I'm left in the dust.  Then, there are those times when I'm moving so quickly, trying to get everything accomplished, that I leave behind the most important things in life.  Isn't it odd how that happens?  We do what we have to in order to get by and end up forgetting about or neglecting that which gives us life.  Well, maybe I'm the only one, but I'm guessing someone agrees with me on this.

Since going back to school from Christmas break, every week has been jam-packed with more work than I have time to do.  I stay up as late as possible for me, which means I'm out by midnight almost every night, and every waking moment is spent in an attempt to decrease my workload.  Not only is this exhausting, but it leaves little time for God.  Now, I'm not blaming professors for my poor time management, but I just want to put it out there that it happens.  Maybe you can relate, and if you do I hope you realize that you're not alone. 

I get caught up in deadlines, those little numbers I write in my planner that dictate whether or not I have time for a bit of freedom.  When I do have the occasional chance to relax a bit, I have to admit that I don't go straight to God.  He's the source of life, yet I reach for my phone as if that game I've been playing is going to magically take away my stress.  It never has before . . . but maybe this time, beating that level will fulfill my need.  I fall for it every time.  I'm currently shaking my head, wondering how I can believe such an obvious lie.  I think part of the problem is that there is no deadline for spending time with God.  No one is going to fail me if I don't read my Bible every day, so I don't treat it with the same priority.  There is some harm in that thought process, but our freedom is really a wonderful thing.  This freedom of choice He gives us is ours to do with what we please.  

I guess what I really wanted to do here was to shed some light on a situation because nothing good ever comes from keeping things in the dark. 

Confession #1: It's easy to forget about God

Drifter

Sometimes it feels like we're drifting through life doing just enough to get by.  If we're honest, these times occur more than we would like to admit.  It can be difficult to build a foundation that will stay constant when we are jumping from one source to another to find fulfillment and peace.  It's an exhausting process that ends in emptiness and leaves us focused mainly on ourselves.  Unfortunately, we even experience times like this as Christians.  God is the perfect, unchanging foundation to our lives, but we feel like drifters when we take our focus off of Him. 

Our lives are meant to be offerings.  Don't let yourself get lost wandering through life.  God has a plan for every one of us.  He desires to shine light into our darkest days.  He longs for us to follow His lead.  God is for us, not against us.    

Sometimes, He leads us to sources of inspiration that draw us nearer to Him.  I think this was the case when I was introduced to music by Mike Mains and the Branches over the summer.  I've been loving their songs ever since, and one in particular stood out to me.  It's one of those songs that I tend to turn into a prayer as I sing it.  Since I can't really say it better than the lyrics themselves, I will put those below.  I hope you find as much truth and encouragement from this song as I have.

Drifter 

If you're calling me a drifter,
I'd say you're probably right
Just trying to get to where I'm going
Even if I don't know where it is

And if you're calling me a liar
Well, a liar is fine
I'm so sorry to have hurt you
I'll leave you alone

PRECHORUS:
Cause I've been so stuck on myself
Can't seem to help anyone else

CHORUS:
Tear me down again and build me back anew
Rid me of myself and fill me up with you
Take me to the place where I once knew
You were for me and not against me

And if you say I have no peace
I'd say you're probably right
Cause I can't seem to find it
You see I don't know what it is

My God, my God, my past haunts me
From the top of the morning to the bottom of the night
So sick, so sick of walking in darkness
Oh please shine your light

PRECHORUS
CHORUS

2ND CHORUS:
Tell me where to run and that's where I'll go
I want so bad for once just to finally know
That I'm not above and I'm not below
The place that you want me

I've burned so many bridges
I've run out of bridges to burn
I've failed so many times
I'm wondering if I'll ever learn
It's you I need, Its you I want,
It's you who can complete
This very world, this very life
That you've begun in me

CHORUS
2ND CHORUS

Create in me a new heart and make it clean
A single-minded pursuit of everything
That you would desire from this offering
That you call my life